TRIBUTE

We all have friends at important times in our lives, but there is no question that during our high school years at Clarence Central, that Scott Sindelar was simply my closest friend. My life was greatly shaped by his influence.  High school years were difficult for me as I lost my beloved father to a heart attack at the beginning of Freshman year.  He was the rock of our family, and as the youngest of five, and the only one remaining at home, I was pretty lost, desperately searching for meaning and direction. It was a different era, and I simply went back into student life without any word whatsoever from school counsellors. Around that time, I met this new kid, Scott, newly transferred to Clarence from Chicago, and through our friendship and shared love of music I began to see a reason to look forward to tomorrow. 

When I read the stories of how John and Paul came together to form the Beatles it’s not unlike how Scott and I found each other through music. I’m not sure at which point we came up with the idea of starting a band. Scott had already been playing guitar and I had been playing piano as well, listening intently to radio music I had recorded on my open-reel tape recorder and learning the keyboard parts by ear. 

Each of us had different tastes, and because we played different instruments, we found our way with different musical favorites. But what an era in which to discover music! The Beatles, The Doors, The Jimi Hendrix Experience, The Animals, The Young Rascals were just a few of our many influences. 

I was convinced that I had to have a real rock n roll instrument if I was ever to be in a band. I saved up my money I had been earning by working for my brother’s taxi business and, with a bit of help from my mom, went to Olson's Music in Williamsville and bought my first rock and roll keyboard. It was a black Acetone Combo Compact organ and a Multivox amplifier that I used as a bench seat. I practiced constantly in my bedroom, and by the next year Scott and I had started a band with our friend Craig Richards who also played guitar. We practiced every weekend in whichever of our parents would allow their garage to be turned into a rehearsal studio. We eventually recruited John Houston for lead vocals and an underclassman, Kyle MacDowell, on drums. 

Our band didn’t even have a name (we settled on Gasoline Rainbow) when we played our first gig, a battle of the bands at Nativity School where were voted first place out of five bands.  By the next summer, our band, now named Web, played four weekend dates at the Clarence Town Park. Pictures survive, as does a tape recording of one of the gigs! Our set was heavily stocked with songs by The Doors (Light My Fire, Love Me Two Times, and Soul Kitchen), The Animals (Don’t Bring Me Down, We’ve Gotta Get Out of This Place) and The Young Rascals (Come On Up, Land of 1000 Dances, Slow Down) along with Satisfaction, Midnight Hour and a few others. Listening to the sole remaining tape from those gigs, both Scott and I did a pretty good job of duplicating the parts we heard on the records. 

But our connection wasn’t just about music. During a turbulent societal era, Scott’s comradeship gave me the confidence to explore any ideas I might have had. And because Scott had use of his mother’s Chevrolet Camaro, we could explore ideas outside of our suburban enclave of Clarence. We went anywhere our heart’s desired – downtown Buffalo to record shops, concerts, head shops or Army-Navy stores where we aspiring hippies could buy the clothes we didn’t want to get by enlisting. 

During the Civil Rights Era, as race relations were an important topic in our classroom discussions, Scott and I founded an after-school Human Relations discussion group. We wanted to learn more about the world, but as two boys living in a nearly all-white community, our options were limited. One day we came up with the idea of going to a source, so we piled into the Camaro and drove to the Nation of Islam’s Temple #23 at 512 Broadway in downtown Buffalo. We walked up to the imposing wooden door and knocked. When a formidable man came to the door asking what we wanted, we introduced ourselves as students looking for information on their cause. The man closed the door and disappeared as Scott and I stood on the sidewalk, bewildered. Then the door opened again and the man stuck a copy of their paper Muhammed Speaks through the door and said “read this.”  We were proud to share it with our after-school group. When a classmate in our group informed us that her sister, who taught at a black elementary school, would welcome us as tutors to her students, Scott encouraged me to go to Mr. Ettleson, our Vice Principal to ask for a school bus to drive us there on Saturday mornings.  We filled the bus with classmates and tutored kids each weekend in reading and math until we graduated.  

I had been introduced to DeMolay, a youth organization sponsored by the Masons to promote positive ideals in young men, and I was so glad when Scott joined me there as my fraternal brother. We both proceeded among the ranks all through high school, each of us attaining the rank of Master Counsellor. Our DeMolay chapter raised money for charities through paper drives, basketball dribbles as well as instilling values in the subsequent candidates we initiated into our ranks. 

Scott was a part of the hot-air ballon UFO launches with Dave Saylor I chronicled on this site - one of which nearly set fire to the second floor of his house before finally going aloft. We crazily chased the glowing balloon through the dark of the surrounding farmlands until Scott literally ran into an alien in the darkness.  It turned out to be a cow.  We nearly died laughing.

We lost touch after high school graduation. I knew Scott had moved to Florida had become a psychologist and subsequently moved to Arizona. Some twenty years ago my new golf business took me to Phoenix and we reunited along with our wives and daughters for a pleasant evening dinner. It was like we had never separated. Friends for life. I learned of Scott’s passion for flying ultra-light aircraft, and his love of being a dad and husband. We subsequently reconnected through Facebook. 

Another thing that comes up in reflecting on our relationship is that Scott and I never argued. You would think that close friends might have areas of disagreement, but this never happened between us.  It was as if we were on the same wavelength with the same open-mindedness and love of exploring ideas.

I was thrilled that Scott came to our Fiftieth Class Reunion and I spent most of my time there with Scott and his loving wife, Suzie. We shared dinners and a tour of Clarence High School. What I noticed most about Scott, other than that he was the same person I always knew and loved is that he had become intensely thoughtful and compassionate, likely as a result of his psychological practice. He confessed that in his practice he had been treating a number of ex-military who had come back with wartime post traumatic stress disorder. It was clear to me that Scott had given much of himself in order to help others, but had no regrets having done so. 

How do you sum up a relationship that has had such a profound effect on your life as Scott has had on mine? I just know that the times we shared together exploring the world around us through our band and our times growing in leadership abilities as DeMolay brothers, as well as sharing our personal adventures through life were absolutely essential to me becoming the man I have become.  The moments we had together will never be forgotten by me.

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